She’s the Glue for Everyone — But She’s Quietly Falling Apart: And no one notices — because she never lets them see her break.

She’s the one who remembers birthdays. Keeps the household running. Checks in on her friends. Shows up at work, on time, getting sh*t done. Handles her kids. Her partner. Her aging parents. Smiles at the cashier. Texts “How can I help?” when someone else is struggling.

She’s the glue.
The rock.
The dependable one.

And no one sees her falling apart. Because she does it in the car.
In the shower. In the bathroom behind a locked door, muffling her cries with a towel.

This Is What It Looks Like to Quietly Break Down:
• She cancels plans because she’s emotionally depleted — but says it’s just “a busy week.”
• She answers “doing okay!” in texts while feeling like she’s drowning.
• She keeps the kitchen spotless but hasn’t eaten a real meal in days.
• She shows up at work while battling panic attacks in the parking lot.
• She handles everyone’s problems — and hasn’t been asked about her own in months.

She’s Been Taught Her Pain Is Inconvenient

When you’re the glue, you learn how to hold it all.

You learn to suppress your feelings so other people don’t get uncomfortable. You learn to function at 2% energy and still get everyone out the door. You learn to bury your grief, your rage, your needs — because someone else “has it worse.”

And eventually, you forget what you even need.

You become a master of crisis control. But inside? You’re craving rest. Quiet. Safety. Somebody — anybody — to notice.

But Here’s the Problem: The Glue Eventually Cracks

And when it does?
No one is prepared.
Because they’ve never seen you not hold it all together.

They don’t know what to say when you cry. They don’t believe you when you whisper, “I’m not okay.” They minimize it — “You’re just stressed” — and move on.

But you know.
You know something’s not right. You know you can’t keep holding everyone and never be held.

This Is Your Permission Slip to Let Go

Let go of the pressure.
Let go of the perfection.
Let go of the idea that being everything to everyone is what makes you valuable.

You are allowed to come undone.
You are allowed to ask, “What about me?”
You are allowed to stop being the damn glue.

And if you don’t know where to start? That’s why The No Apologies Journal exists. That’s why Back to Me was written.

To give you a space where you can finally tell the truth —
even if it’s messy, raw, and doesn’t have a solution yet.

Because healing doesn’t start with a plan.
It starts with a breakdown.
One you no longer have to hide.

❤️ STG Wellness
Truth. Fire. Healing.

STG Wellness was founded by licensed clinical social worker Jamie Codispoti.

We create bold, therapist-crafted guided journals to help you reflect, reconnect, and reclaim your voice.

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Learn more at sloanetherapygroup.com